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Home » Category » Computers

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» (1) True Computer Illiteratcy
Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The ...
By: 5-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 5196 times
» (2) How To Keep The IT Guy Happy
When you call us to have your computer moved, be sure to leave it buried under half a ton of postcards, baby pictures, stuffed animals, dried flowers, bowling trophies and children's art. We don't have a life, and we find it deeply moving to catch a fleet ...
By: 5-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 5468 times
» (3) Virus Warnings
BOBBIT VIRUS: Removes a vital part of your hard disk, then reattaches it. Unfortunately, the area is permanently disabled. OPRAH WINFREY VIRUS: Your 200 MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80 MB,and then slowly expands back to 200 MB. AT&T VIRUS: Ev ...
By: 5-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 4531 times
» (4) Hi-Tech Conference
Bill Gates, Andy Grove, & Jerry sanders (CEOs of Microsoft, Intel & AMD) were in a high-powered business meeting. During the serious, tense discussions, a beeping noise was suddenly emitted from where Bill was sitting. Bill said : "Oh! that's my emerge ...
By: 14-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 4995 times
» (5) Wrong Email Address
It's wise to remember how easily this wonderful technology can be misused, sometimes unintentionally, with serious consequences. Consider the case of the Illinois man who left the snow-filled streets of Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a ...
By: 14-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 4820 times
» (6) No More Nerds Allowed
A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar he sees a big sign on the door saying "NERDS NOT ALLOWED--ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!" He goes in and sits down. The bartender comes over to him, sniff ...
By: 14-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 4100 times
» (7) The Dr. Seuss Computer Manual
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort, And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report! If your cursor finds a menu item fol ...
By: 14-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 4918 times
» (8) GM -vs.- Microsoft
Bill Gates is hanging out with the chairman of General Motors. 'If automotive technology had kept pace with computer technology over the past few decades,' boasts Gates, 'you would now be driving a V-32 instead of a V-8, and it would have a top speed of 1 ...
By: 14-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 3854 times
» (9) Male or Female
A language instructor was explaining to her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine. Things like 'chalk' or 'pencil,' she described, would have a gender association although in Engl ...
By: 14-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 4112 times
» (10) Microsoft Fix-all
There are three engineers in a car; an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer and a Microsoft engineer. Suddenly the car just stops by the side of the road, and the three engineers look at each other wondering what could be wrong. The electrical eng ...
By: 14-Nov-2004 Added On : Issabela Viewed : 3965 times

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